I want to take photos with Danny as Joker and Harley because it is how we first met. I’d love to compare our photo from six years ago to now. I know the glow up would be epic. I’d also like to attend NYCC with Danny one day, and not have this existential dread come over me at the very thought of attending a con again.
Why does my costume have such negativity attached to it? I thought I could revisit a simple cosplay from the past, but it feels so strange.
Danny and I weren’t together during that period of my life, and thus, we come from very different worlds, in terms, of the convention experience. Mine was very much branded in cosplay, which soon lead to plenty of drama. I often found myself caught in the midst of situations I didn’t want to be in. Looking back, I’m regretful of the negative and sour attitude I had at the time, which was constantly being fueled by the cosplay environment. I don’t regret my cosplay life though. Our worlds eventually collided, and now, Danny is stuck with me forever lol.
Ultimately, I need to figure out how to re-wire my emotions, and redirect them to more positive thoughts and experiences when it comes to conventions. I want to fully support Danny in his future endeavors, and experience it all with him, which includes selling and showcasing his art and brand at cons. I want to be there for everything that he does in life. Maybe, this is the beginning of a new chapter for me. Slowly but surely, I am dipping my toes back into the red and black swirl of chaos with my own Puddin’ by my side. I think this will be a much happier chapter of me donning the shiny vinyl suit of Harley girl once more.
Photos by View Beyond Sight
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